The man who just stepped out of the photograph

left his young sister lazing on rocks
on a sandy beach with his close friends,
Mr & Mrs Rolfe, sitting tidily nearby.
It’s a rare holiday for the 13 year old,
whose parents run a pub, have no time off.

Her slim and lanky frame is covered by
a swimsuit deemed figure-hugging in 1934,
first indication perhaps of the modelling
career to come in the 40s and 50s.
Relaxed optimism beams from the picture.

Five years later, on a sultry August day
three long weeks before the outbreak
of the Second World War, the man
who stepped out died of tuberculosis.
He was my uncle. I never met him.

Now, just a few inches high, he strolls
around the collection of family shots
on the sideboard, puzzles over groupings,
hesitates, rubs his chin as he studies
a photo of dark-haired teenage girls

playing cricket with grandparents
on a remote Scottish beach. He lingers
over the lady, stylish and upright seven
decades on, then, with a brief sigh
of reassurance, steps back into his own.

 

Nicky Phillips lives in Hertfordshire. Her poems have been published in magazines
and online. In 2017 one was nominated for Forward Prize for Best Single Poem. Her
pamphlet Jam in Aisle 3 was published by Dempsey & Windle in 2018.

Christmas Voices

I hope the carol singers come back tonight,
with pure songs, tales of joy, family, inclusion.
Their voices are so much sweeter than Tom’s,
the strong one in my head that tries to control me.

My parents spoke to me, they’re away for Christmas,
I must stand on my own two feet. Sam, our spaniel,
helps calm me, but when I wanted to call round,
they told me they’re packing, taking him to kennels.

Tom’s always here, never stops talking, wakes me
by shouting, tells me what to do, says I’m worthless,
a burden, no use to anyone. I turn on Christmas radio,
watch films on TV; they help, a little, sometimes.

Even the doctor can’t see me till January.
And the team aren’t available over the holiday.
Perhaps they would all be better off without me.
I do hope the carol singers come back tonight.

 

Nicky Phillips lives in Hertfordshire. Her poems have been published in magazines
and online. In 2017 one was nominated for Forward Prize for Best Single Poem. Her
pamphlet Jam in Aisle 3 was published by Dempsey & Windle in 2018.